Support is a crucial factor for being successful.
But what if you have no support from anyone or your loved ones just don’t believe in you?
It can hold you back, you feel rubbish and you realize that no one is cheering for you to do well.
But why?
Do the people closest to you feel better when you aren’t earning as much as them?
Do they feel happier knowing you would never achieve more than them?
When you began your business start-up journey did they get scared? Feel inadequate? Can’t bring themselves to be supportive?
Does your success and motivation threaten them?
The person I’m talking about could be a friend, colleague, aunt or uncle. But these people are more like secondary family members. Surely you’ll get over that?
So what about your closest family members? What if you can’t get support from your parents, brothers or sisters.
If you can’t get support from them, then who can you get support from?
What do you do?
Quit? Fail? (On purpose) Self-sabotage? All three of these will make un-supportive people happy. And all we want to do is make our families happy.
The answer really depends on how bad you want a successful business.
Yes, we want to make our nearest and dearest happy, but what about our own happiness and success?
Do you want to look back and think I compromised my happiness, my success and my life to make others happy? And now I’m the one who is sad.
We can’t change where we came from and who are family are but…
If it makes others happy to see you fail, they aren’t worth giving a lot of your time to.
I don’t recommend you cut ties, burn bridges or wave goodbye to family. But I do recommend you accept that you have no support, but still push forwards with your dreams.
A business start-up is harder without support and even harder when others are desperate for you to fail but at least you know the truth.
Don’t get upset, don’t give in. You are important too and reaching your goals should never be compromised to make someone else happy.
Believe in yourself
…Unsupportive people are only mad because you’re doing what they’re too scared to…
Yes, it would be nice for others to believe in you. But you don’t control the actions of others.
If they don’t support your courage and positive actions just move on. Don’t whine, don’t complain, don’t spend hours thinking why me?
As I say to my 5 year old…
…“Complaining gets you nowhere! Only action does love”…
Don’t rely on others. You are all you need to power your business start-up.
Do you believe in yourself?
If you are thinking about a business start-up there must have been some element of self-belief or you wouldn’t be considering it at all.
For example – you don’t think to yourself… “Hmmm maybe I’ll try flying to work tomorrow” because there are no possibilities of that happening, so you won’t ever consider it.
Business Start-up Self Belief Boosters…
1. Start believing in Yourself or No One Else Will
If you’re considering a start-up that means there is something within you that believes you can make it happen. Hold onto that feeling. Your amazing feeling of self-belief is what will drive you towards your dreams.
Self-Belief Action – Write down your vision of the biggest goal for your business start-up. Do you want to own a chain of restaurants? Develop the ‘next big thing’ in technology? Or run a small successful business with 3 committed staff members?
Be clear on this vision and spend 2 mins a day thinking about it. First thing in morning or just before you go to bed are great times to do this.
It’s your vision, so dream big. Let nothing hold you back. Write it down and place it somewhere visible to you daily.
2. Learn to Manage Negative People
If you are surrounded by an unsupportive person (or people) the chances are they expel negativity too. You have to learn when to see this negativity and put actions in place so it doesn’t affect you.
In the past before learning how to manage negative people I would sit in a room and be surrounded by their negative words, thoughts, actions or aggressive comments and I found that even after leaving their company the negativity still had an impact.
For the rest of day (sometimes the next day too) I would feel low, depressed and less motivated. A very close relative of mine who was tremendously positive and suffering from terminal illness actually said after being surrounded by such negativity she felt even sicker for at least the next 2 days!
Self-Belief Action – Becoming aware of a negative person is not difficult. Think about it now. Who do you know who is always complaining, always sad, always angry, always a victim of their life.
They rarely speak of nice experiences, rarely compliment anyone or are never just happy for the sake of it.
If you have no choice but to be around such a negative person be aware of what they are saying, their body language and the remarks they make.
Once you’re aware of their actions the picture changes. They sound sad, they look desperate for attention and they seem a bit pointless.
Imagine and tell yourself that you will not allow such ridiculous behaviour to penetrate your mind and disturb your thoughts.
Once you realise and accept such a person for what they really are, their ridiculous behaviour starts to wash over you. And it gets easier and easier with practice.
3. This is Only a Bump, Not a Brick Wall
Incase you hadn’t realised starting a business means a lot of hard work and you have to learn how to prioritise the most important jobs which will push your business forwards.
Worrying about unsupportive people is a waste of time. I understand it’s difficult to ‘just forget about’ an unsupportive person especially if they are immediate family like a parent, your child or siblings but you have to accept that the family and friends you love are a certain type of person and get over it.
Self-Belief Action – Don’t view this situation as ‘terrible’ or something you have to recover from. It’s the way things are. Business start –ups are full of hurdles on the route to success and this is another bump in the road.
If you can’t tackle this one you’ll struggle with the many hurdles ahead. Accept and move on.
4. Leopards don’t change their spots (unless they really want to)
The majority of successful entrepreneurs would agree to boost your success you should surround yourself with like-minded people.. Most importantly to cut off the negative, soul draining people who only bring you down.
I don’t disagree with this but what these entrepreneurs never discuss is, what if the ‘negative, soul draining person who only brings you down’ is related to you. What if it’s your mum, dad or you live with them (you might even be married to them!)
In these circumstances you can’t just cut them off. They are a part of your life and who you are.
Self-Belief Action – You have to limit the time and energy you give to unsupportive, negative people. The majority of time nothing they have to talk about is of benefit to you and can be damaging.
When you have no choice but to be around unhealthy negative people just don’t engage with them.
They might want to talk about who is the worst dressed celebrity, why their boss is so awful, why they have neighbours from hell or why the suggestions you made were useless and stupid. But you have to choose not to engage in their pointless conversations.
The more you do this, the sooner they will realise you aren’t interested in senseless babbling.
TIP (always works for me!) – When asked a question by a negative person who you know will only turn your reply into something nasty… Remember to give only one worded answer.
That way it’s more difficult for them to create such a passionate negative response or be drawn into an argument or unnecessary debate.
Conclusion
Your business start-up means growing a thick skin and learning to manage and brush off useless remarks and comments.
We are only human so negative remarks, comments and actions still hurt, but it’s your choice about how badly you allow it to affect you.
If you want your business start-up you have to go out there and get it…
And not let anything and anybody stand in your way
Tell me about your support network?
Have you overcome zero support? Are you still struggling to cope?
Share your experiences in the comments area.